Before a test or a major event, have you ever had sweaty hands, chills up and down your back, a scared feeling that you’re going to fail or something is going to go wrong? Well, that’s exactly how I felt when the scheduler called me to schedule an appointment for Luke to review the results from the MRI from last Tuesday. As the scheduler was talking, my heart kept racing and I felt cold and hot at the same time, breaking into the sweats but not actually sweating. I was scared. I didn’t know what to think. I received the results prior to this call but I’m no medical technician or professional; I have no idea how to read these scans or any scans for that matter.
I received the scans a day after and me being curious person that I am, I read off the results. Of course they make no sense to me. So what do I do that any person with no medical person would do? I did what I shouldn’t have done…I consult Dr. Google. I search keywords and of course my eyes get big as I read through what the results could mean…my worst fear…bad news. Of course I have no idea what I’m doing and Dr. Google isn’t a medical professional either. I shouldn’t listen or read too much into what I’m reading but I was curious. I read that the lesions on Luke’s spleen could be a cause of a cyst or a tumor which means that (of course based on Dr. Google) once Luke is diagnosed, there’s only a 5 year life span and that’s if there’s no complications. After reading this news, my mind went wandering and thinking of all of the worse possible scenarios there could be. I decided to stop killing myself with all this nonsense so I put the computer away and just spent time with Luke. I did what I could to make myself of other things than what I had just read.
Then there was today. Today was MRI results reveal day. I was on egg shells all morning. I tried to concentrate on my work but time was moving so fast I didn’t have time to think. Luke’s appointment was at 11:20 a.m. We arrived at the office a few minutes early just so that we could hang out and not stress out. We watched the cartoons playing on the tv in the kids room. Inspector Gadget was playing. I remember this cartoon when I was growing up. Luke seemed to enjoy it. He was content on watching the cartoon which was good to keep his mind off of what we were about to learn from the cardiologist.
After about 15 minutes, we were called back. The usual occurred, Luke’s oxygen levels are checked, his height is measured, his weight is calculated and his blood pressure is taken. We are then taken to the back room where we wait some more. It’s a good thing Luke brought his tablet because he would be going crazy with all this waiting. After about 10 minutes, the cardiologist comes in to see us and he doesn’t seem distraught by the results of the MRI. In fact, he makes small talk with Luke and talks to him a bit about the game that he’s playing. Then, it’s my turn.
The cardiologist comes to sit next to me and goes over the results. What I love about this cardiologist is that he knows he’s smarter than me and he understands that what he’s about to tell me will go way over my head so he draws pictures. I love that. All this medical terminology makes my brain hurt.
Anyway, the doctor explains what each medical term means and what they do for Luke’s heart. He tells me what we already know…Luke’s right ventricle is enlarged…a lot larger than his left ventricle. He tells me that Luke’s pulmonary valve is still leaking. He also tells me that Luke’s right ventricle is pumping but not working very well. The amount of oxygenated blood versus the non-oxygenated blood that’s being pumped into and out of Luke’s blood is on the tipping scale. The end result of all of this information is that we can wait for surgery but…since Luke is very small…the doctor will consult Stanford Hospital about their clinical trial regarding the new way to repair a pulmonary valve.
As of right now, it’s a waiting game. I’m happy we don’t have to go back into surgery yet, but I’m back on egg shells with the wait. Luke’s next follow up is in six months. In the meantime, we will wait to see what Stanford says about the clinical trial. Cross your fingers.
Luke Riley 